Why compassion for other's weaknesses, shortcomings and faults?

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Why compassion for other's weaknesses, shortcomings and faults? I just read a simple and good answer in Catching Fire (2nd book in The Hunger Games trilogy, p.32):

"Because sometimes things happen to people and they're not equipped to deal with them."

Too often we hold people to the standard of our own preparation and abilities, when the truth is not all are equipped the same. Compassion creates space to learn and become equipped. Judgment creates no space, only demands immediate compliance.


— For more tips, strategies and resources for creating truly GREAT relationships with self and others visit http://JonathanSherman.net —

Liked it? Want more? Get the Great Relationships eBook.

It may be obvious, but I like to make it even more so.

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It may be obvious that I love my family madly, crazy, nutso, gonzo, but I like to make it even more so.

It's just hard hard to make anyone feel too loved or appreciated. I like to flood my family with as many subtle and obvious messages that they are noticed, loved and wonderful.

How do YOU appreciate your family? Please share your ideas.

— For more tips, strategies and resources for creating truly GREAT relationships with self and others visit http://JonathanSherman.net —

Liked it? Want more? Get the Great Relationships eBook.

The Soul of Compassion: Understanding

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The Soul of Compassion: Understanding

The key to a GREAT relationship is REALLY understanding, which is the soul of compassion. To know someone so fully that you can see past what you disagree with about them to what really makes them tick. To fully understand them as they are instead of as they "should" be opens up the door to truly loving someone.

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Stress-Busting Tip: Use the Biology of Touch

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The biology of touch is simply this: hugging, hand holding, encouraging hand on arm or shoulder, or a simple neck or back rub decreases cortisol (the stress hormone), increases oxytocin (the "cuddle" hormone that increases bonding) which both result in lowered blood pressure.

The biology is there within us to manage stress. Let's use it, touch (human and yes, canine as in the picture above, too), frequently to help ourselves and others.

Thus, the important interplay of relationships, emotions and biology. Relationships are the key to so many aspects. It is in relationships that our emotions are challenged the most and thus we get the opportunity because of those challenges to develop emotion regulation and mastery skills. As we improve our ability to manage our emotions in our relationships we decrease the impact of stress on our bodies. Thus, the finding that people in long-term healthy marriages live on average seven years longer than their single or divorced counterparts. Less stress equals less wear and tear on our cells the emotional flood of cortisol and adrenaline isn't as frequent nor as long-lasting. Less wear and tear = longer life. Further the oxytocin and endorphins that healthy relating release further ease stress and buffer our emotions from additional stress = longer life.


— For more tips, strategies and resources for creating truly GREAT relationships with self and others visit http://JonathanSherman.net —

Liked it? Want more? Get the Great Relationships eBook.

Quick Bonding Activity: "All About..."

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Quick Bonding Activity: "All About..."

Occasionally, in church, I like to pass around to each family member a piece of paper titled, "All About (Name): (Name) Is..." And then let each family member add whatever kind of observation they have about that person. The benefits are simple and important: The writer is able to reflect on the good qualities of that person and the recipient gets to feel great and appreciated. It's a quick, simple, yet meaningful, way to feel connected and to further solidify the family bond and loyalty to one another. It's also interesting and fun to find out what each other notice about each other.

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Any Dad's Relate to the Work of the Woman, the Craft of the Father?

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Any Dad's Relate to the Work of the Woman, the Craft of the Father?

"I stand outside this woman's work. Now starts the craft of the father."
—Kate Bush, This Woman's Work, from the movie She's Having a Baby

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PARENTING FINESSE Tip 10: Keep Consequences Simple, Logical & Lecture Free

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PARENTING FINESSE Tip 10: Keep Consequences Simple, Logical & Lecture Free

Keep consequences simple, logical, and lecture free. For example, lately on Sunday mornings my kids have been dawdling and ending up being late for church. No big deal in the grand scheme of things. However, it's the type of thing that parents typically get bothered by when it happens repeatedly. As parents, we feel a responsibility to teach and guide our children towards respectful and appropriate behavior, such as punctuality…

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Parenting Finesse Tip 9: Tell Less. Explore More

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Parenting Finesse Tip 9: Tell Less. Explore More

There is much that our children need to be taught of right and wrong. That is certainly important. In addition, what is even more important is that they be taught not only how to think, but how to know themselves enough to learn to know their own authentic truth. This they must learn to do on their own. They do need guidance, but guide. Don't take over…

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