Fathering a Future Husband

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Last night my cool, hip and happenin' 16-year-old son asked if I would give him and his wife mariage advice when he is married. I told him, "Of course." Now whether or not his wife will want it or not is up to her, which I respect, and it will be between them to craft their life together. What touched me was his valuing of my counsel in his life and the bond we share. I am touched to my core with the faith and trust given me from my child turned teen soon to turn man. It is for moments like that that as a father I willingly toil and labor to be the kind of man he needs and deserves to guide him. I pray that all men will rise to the challenge of this sacred calling of Fatherhood.

Morning Mindfulness Moment

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Morning Mindfulness Moment

I walked out of my office this morning to wait for my client in the cool air and sunshine. At that moment, I heard the chirping of birds and through the barren trees saw the striking beauty of Mount Timpanogos to the east. I was overcome by a sense of peaceful happiness as I considered how interconnected all things are. I heard the bird, felt the chill in the air, felt the warm sun, smelled the cold of the air, and squinted at the brightness of the sun. My five senses took it all in—in a single moment—and my spirit thrilled. It was so apparent how connected all my senses were to that around me and how dependent they were on these things to have sense in the first place….

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The GREAT Parenting Masters

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Come and be inspired by these GREAT Parenting Masters. Greatness ≠ perfection. Greatness just means it's great. I learn from these great parents who are just real everyday folks trying to do their best for their kids. I admire that and am humbled my them. I continually seek to give my children a legacy of good parenting they can draw from just as I have been able to do.

Greatest Accomplishment?

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Speaker, author and great humanitarian Tiffany Berg Painter (that's her to the right), whom I am happy to know, asked on Facebook today:

"What do you feel is your greatest accomplishment in life so far?"

My response:

Great question. Tough to answer with just one thing but I'll list a progression of the greatest accomplishments so far in my life:
  1. Accepting Christ into my life as a teenager--opened up the door to SO, SO, SO many good things most especially:
  2. Meeting my best friend and marrying her--who gave me:
  3. My four greatest treasures. So proud of the fine young people they are and so grateful to be their father. Eternally grateful for my wife for them. Amen and amen!
  4. My education, training, profession and successful independent practice as a relationship strategist (marriage and family therapist). So proud and impressed by my amazing clients who take on the tough challenges of life and overcome!
  5. I can trace all of these accomplishments (or rather gifts) to the first on the list. Hallelujah!
Liked it? Want more? Get the Great Relationships eBook.

GREAT Relationships don't 'just happen'... They are created!

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GREAT Relationships don't 'just happen'... They are created!

Okay gang. Here's the low down. Everyone WANTS a great relationship—a happy marriage, a loving and profound connection with their children, an enjoyable workplace—but the reality is most people are doing just that: Wanting. And from that wanting their relationships are left wanting (e.g., lacking).

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GREAT Relationships don't 'just happen'... They are created!

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by: Jonathan Sherman

Okay gang. Here's the low down. Everyone WANTS a great relationship—a happy marriage, a loving and profound connection with their children, an enjoyable workplace—but the reality is most people are doing just that: Wanting. And from that wanting their relationships are left wanting (e.g., lacking).

Instead of actually engaging in the work of creation, most people are hoping, wishing, and waiting for the great relationship they want. Then when it doesn't come or "just happen" they turn that wanting into criticism, complaints, contempt and resentment which guarantees that GREATness in their relationships will continue to elude them.

Wake up: Relationships will no longer tolerate sloppiness. The supports just aren't there anymore for poor relationships to be held together regardless of whether they "should" or not.

So how do we create GREATness in our relationships? The same way we create anything else in this life: Study the masters; learn the best practices; practice, practice, practice; integrate; take action; and maintain a willingness to change course, modify strategies, and dump approaches that just aren't working.

In all of this creation of GREATness the only part that "wanting" plays is the initial creation of the vision and the ongoing motivation to do the requisite work towards that vision's goals. In other words, the work of GREATness is summed up as follows:

"Knowing is not enough, you must apply;
willing is not enough, you must do."
—Bruce Lee

So where do we go to study the masters and learn the best practices? Start here: At rel8gr8.com you will find:

  • Relationship strategist Jonathan Sherman's services, workshops, resources and free articles all designed towards GREATness creation;
  • The GREAT Relationships eZine Blog
  • The GREAT Relationship Masters Project which gives models of GREAT relationships that we can study and learn from. Too many people have no clue what a GREAT relationship actually looks like up close and personal. Well here they are. Study and emulate those who've mastered the path of GREATness.
  • Valentine's All Year (VAY) is "A glimpse into one man's ongoing love affair with his wife." Every entry contains personal examples as well as a corresponding and specific GREAT Relationship Principle applicable to all relationships who aspire to GREATness. VAY includes these two daily and weekly blogs:

The good news is that "not knowing" how to create a GREAT relationship is no longer an excuse. The hackneyed excuse of "my marriage/child didn't come with an owner's manual" no longer flies. The knowledge and practices are available. The coaching and support exists to integrate the learning.

Now is the time for GREATness. GREATness does not come to those who wait. It never "comes." It is created and re-created daily. Create it!

Liked it? Want more? Get the Great Relationships eBook.

"Get a Dog!" by Ben Stein

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Screen shot 2013-08-27 at 3.18.59 PMWe humans must be trained to develop relationship mastery. While we are the masters of our dogs, they are the masters of actually practicing the highest virtues we only say we hold dear. Ben Stein, in his classic deadpan humor, nails it:

"No matter what the problem in life dogs are the answer... Did you lose your job? Horrible. But that just means you have more time to spend at home with your dog... Your dog doesn't need a master with a big job. He needs a friend... Take the first step to recovery right now: Get a dog."

Liked it? Want more? Get the Great Relationships eBook.