THE QUOTE

Love is what you've been through with somebody.
—James Thurber

[Tevye and Golde from The Fiddler on the Roof]

THE LOVE NOTE
K—
I am so grateful that we've never been stingy with our expressions of love and affection for each other. So many people I know wish to hear words of affection, encouragement, and love from their partners. Thank you, baby, for all you also do that so well matches your words. For 18 years you have done so many things that speak what words cannot. I love you.
—J

THE GREAT RELATIONSHIP PRINCIPLE
Speak Love. It Matters. Say these words sincerely and frequently:

"I love you."
"I love you, because..."
"I notice that you..."
"I love it when you..."
"I am so grateful for you because..."
"You mean so much to me."
"I appreciate you."
"Thank you."
"I don't know what I would do without you."
"You do so much for us."
"What you do is a lot."
"You are enough."
"You are all I need and all I want."

Don't ration words of love and connection. Don't be stingy with the language of love which is the language of life. People come up with the most illogical reasons to justify their holding back expressions of love:

"She'll come to expect it", one man told me. "Yes, exactly. And so should she. She should expect to be treated well by the man who vowed to love her his whole life."

One woman said to me, "Yeah, but he doesn't do..." I replied, "So? He still shouldn't be encouraged greatly for what he does do?"

You've been through so much together. Celebrate with expressions of what IS there vs. holding back these words because of what ISN'T there. Don't know what to say, though? Try this: "We've stuck together through so much. I cannot even begin to tell you how much it means to me that you are here every day through thick and thin. I am amazed that not only did you pick me, but that you still choose me today. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you."